It should be remembered that there are some etiquettes of giving input and feedback in Islam. Some of these are:
- Check your motives (Niyyah) first before opening your mouth. You should be giving constructive criticism only to help someone, not to make yourself feel better than others
- Make Dua for yourself and the person you are approaching before you actually do it
- Think beforehand and choose appropriate words
- Don’t sound critical, condescending, or judgmental
- Timing is important: don’t do it when the fight is on
- Criticism is best received when done one on one
- Remember the Prophet said “A Mumin (believer) is a mirror to another Mumin.” So just state what you see. Don’t exaggerate.
- Keep in mind that your information or even your conclusions may be wrong
- Listen to the explanation attentively and accept it even if it is partially correct in your view
- Avoid debating the point
- Know when to stop. Don’t drag out the discussion if it’s not going anywhere
Just as it’s important to know how to give criticism, it’s
crucial to know how to receive it. Here are some etiquette suggestions:
- Thank the person who considers your improvement important enough to help you with his/her thoughts.
- Welcome the feedback. Ask advice about how it could be improved
- Explain if there is any misunderstanding
- Admit mistakes
- Bad timing should not deter you from listening and benefiting
- The person criticizing should not be stopped because of location, language, or manners.
- Do not turn the table and start criticizing that person in the same sitting.
- Make Dua for the person who is criticizing you
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